SINGLE FAMILY (ANEJA FAMILY) VS JOINT FAMILY (DANG FAMILY) WHAT YOUR CHOICE?

ABSTRACT

Family is where our roots take hold and from there we grow. In India joint family is basically from ancient time. With the passage of time joint family system disintegrated which give rise to nuclear family system. Family is also called as a soil where our roots are held together and from there we can grow as an individual and yet attached to that root of soil. Family is also like a bowl of fruits where we can take fragrance of various fruits which are very essential part of our life. Without it, nobody can live a prosperous life . That amazing fragrance or flavour of fruit can make anyone in world forget their pain and get a wonderful relief. The bonds which create between us since childhood is not only create a respectful relationship but also convert our house into a beautiful dream home. As we know family is a family which come from our heart, we cannot compare family with any divorce paper, marriage certificate or adoption documents. It is very precious thing which everybody get in his life. In this Article I demonstrate my idea toward Single family i.e. Aneja Family and Joint Family (Dang Family). I belong to dang family and I try my best to clear the viewer about pros and cons of both families.

INTRODUCTION

Family is like a bond between many person who are living together to share negative and positive things together. There are two type of families. First is Nuclear Family which are related with some members in family i.e. Husband, Father and Children. Whereas Joint family is a family which are related with more members in family. In this article i quote two families one is Aneja Family and Second is Dang Family my background family is from Dang Family. So I divide the whole Article into two parts. Part I is discussion of pros and cons of Aneja Family (Nuclear Family) and Part II is discussion of pros and cons of Dang Family (Joint Family).
PART I) Discussion on Nuclear Family i.e Aneja Family :– Nuclear Family means single family which are joint in ancient time now become a single family and have separate offspring’s in family which is called Nuclear family. Let’s take an example of an Aneja Family. Aneja family is HUF family in ancient times. Head of the Family is Mr. Sukhwinder Aneja. He is from Pakistan and after division he come to India, struggle hard for settle down his business. After settlement of his business, he got married with Indian girl i.e. Mrs. Rashminder Kaur (who belongs to Delhi) and had three children. One is Female Child (Jasmine Kaur) and two Male Child (Mukhtiar Singh and Tejaswi Singh). After marriage of three child, Aneja Family head i.e. Mr. Sukhwinder Aneja and his wife feel like a lonely, alone at home. why? What is the reason? Reason here is a the family i.e. Aneja Family which is joint from ancient time become a single or nuclear family where there is no place of father (Mr. Sukhwinder Aneja) and mother (Mrs. Rashminder Kaur. All three children’s after marriage busy in their life and meet head of the family occasionally. Their grandson and granddaughter are also even not come to meet their grandparents because their parents busy life. But if we look at life of Jasmine Kaur, Mukhtiar Singh and Tejaswi Singh. Everybody have their own children, their own professional life but still they lack in somewhere like cant go outside because can’t leave children at home alone, nobody there to take suggestions of life, can’t discuss their problem personally or professionally with anyone, can’t take get together. They meet everybody but not on routine life.
PART II Discussion on Joint Family i.e Dang Family :– Joint Family means group of family or extended family which consist of parents, their children, spouses of the Children and their offspring in one household. Let’s take an example of an Dang Family. Dang family is HUF family in ancient times. Head of the Family is Mr. Harwant Singh. He is from Pakistan and after division he come to India, struggle hard for settle down his business. After settlement of his business, he got married with Indian girl i.e. Mrs. Partap Kaur and had six children. All male children. The name of their children : S. Ranjit Singh, S. Sukhbir Singh, S. Harminder Singh, S. Amarjit Singh and S. Rajinder Singh. After Death of Mrs. Partap Kaur, a cetain change came in Mr. Harwant Singh life. But their children never make him alone, lonely till his whole life. His Grandson and Granddaughter keep him busy in game ( nau gotti kartar) which is belong to very popular game of Pakistan. They all live together and share every happy and sorrow moment of life. Whenever there need any of unity, all brothers stand together to beat any obstacle that come in life.
Now I am discussion about the pros and cons of Nuclear Family and Joint Family which are as follow:-

NUCLEAR FAMILY :-
PROS

1) Few Arguments between parents :- There are few arguments between parents in single family. Parents don’t want to fight in front of their children as there is a great impact on mental health of the children. Son in nuclear family this is a great advantage that there is less fight between the parents in front of their children.
2) Good role modelling :- For children whose parents were in unhealthy relationship it may be easier to understand that life can be managed without a partner and there is no reason to be in a relationship.
3) Teaches independence and responsibility :- Because of single parents are so busy in their professional life, children should encouraged to be like a member or head of the team and they learn the responsibility to do their work themselves.
4) Sense of community :- Single parents always rely on others to take care of their children as they are busy in professional life also. This make an introduction of children with new face, new school or organisation where children are kept safe. This increase the level of sense of community between the children and his/her communication level will increase.
5) Level of Confidence :- Single parents are quite busy with professional and household activities which make them not pay attention toward their children. Due to which the children talk more with their classmates, colleagues etc which increase their confidence level.

CONS
1) Schedule changes :- Children may need to adjust according to parents schedule. Like if children want to discuss something then he/she have to wait till their parents get free from their daily activities so schedule changes really affect the children and parents not able to give priorities to their children.
2) Less Quantity of time :- Children time is very precious. And if parents give their time to children then it will make life of their children. But in single family it is not possible because parents are busy in burden of office work which lead to less quantity of time to be spent on children.
3) Scholastic changes :- This kind of changes occur in children because of great number of absent in class, not score good marks in examination, not take actively part in completion. This all occur because parents not able to give time to their children.
4) Negative Feeling :- Some children feel upset because they are not able to get love and affections from the family. Lack of this make them feel negative which lead to make their mental health weak.
5) Problems in accepting new relationships :- because of nuclear family there is a great problems in children in accepting new relationship like they may feel shy or may not able to come forward to face the public. So they are not able to accept the new relationship.

JOINT FAMILY :-
PROS

1) A Child never feel Lonely :- If parents are working, not have time to spend with families but they are living in joint family then the child can never feel alone and lonely in family. He or She keep himself or herself to be busy in family. Like if parents are worried about who will serve the food then these worries will come to an end from the beginning in joint family where grandparents are there to serve him/her food.
2) Happiness Double :- In Joint Family the happiness become double as everybody share their views, happy moment with each other this make increase in happiness of family who belong to joint family.
3) Unity :- There is great unity between the family members just like dang family above quoted. if one suffer from any obstacles in life then everybody stand together in order to minimise the obstacles of family.
4) High rate of learning the art of sharing :- In joint family people may learn the art of sharing. Living in a joint family inculcates the habbit of sharing more social but he also has a habit of sharing.
5) Learn to Respect :- Joint family is a family where people learn respect, how to behave, manners, how to talk etc. Respect of elders are learn more from joint family rather than in single family.
6) Education beyond books :- Living in joint family may teach us to provide education to the children which are beyond books. The education of children living with aunts, brothers, sisters anf grandparents are not restricted to academics but it is much wider.

CONS
1) Privacy Compromised :- Children living in joint family may feel like lack of privacy. This is a common complaint that a people who living in joint family do. Everyone knows everything about the person who are living in family.
2) A small decision run by everyone :- This is also a problem of living together in joint family that even a small decision has to go through and get a green signal from everyone in the family whether it is about going out at 1 pm at night or something else.
3) Financial Responsibility :- Financial Responsibility is on the shoulders of the karta, head of the family which means that all decision related with money are taken by one person i.e head of the family.
4) Woes of common kitchen :- Generally in joint family , all female member are cook together in common kitchen. When it come to food everyone have different choice. This may create a great woes in kitchen

CONCLUSION
The above discussion brought to the light on Single Family and Joint Family. Both play a great role in their own. Now here my question is which family is best in regard of Children. Single Family or a Joint Family. Every family have their own pros and cons. But according to my research or analysis, Joint family is better than a Nuclear family in respect of care of children. Because children feel secure more in joint family rather than in Single Family.

Reference :-

1.) Dixit,Sanjog, Shivam, Geeta, A Study to compare various aspects of members of Joint and Nuclear Family, 16th Jan. 2014, jemds/2014/1879, Journal of Evolution of Medical & Dental Science

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