“I was born in a very Orthodox family where our marriages are arranged at the time of our birth. I was forced into the old tradition of child marriage. I always felt that people should have freedom of choosing their life partners but being young at that point of time you can’t say anything and one has to follow the old rituals and traditions of family. As I was growing up I observed there was no physical change happening in my body, and that wasn’t a good sign. Boys of my age used to have a lot of physical changes and it used to upset me, but I never discussed such issue with my friends or family and just kept the problem with myself. There came a time when after consulting a doctor I finally came to know that I am a third gender (Hijra) and I was born intersex with no reproductive system.”
“My life came down crashing and I was broken. I was scared of telling about my identity to anyone, even my family didn’t know about this. By that time I was 22 and marriage was on cards and I was clueless, I didn’t wanted to spoil that girl’s life but due to our child marriage agreement we had to get married. Few years into the marriage and I was feeling very guilty of cheating my partner with my identity. I was intersex and was unable to satisfy her sexual desires. I had no reproductive organ in my body. Basically I felt like a woman trapped in a man’s body.”
“One fine day I decided to break the silence and told the truth to my family including my wife. Soon I was estranged from family and ostracized from the society. I advised my wife to start a new life by getting married to someone else. The decision to become a hijra was traumatic. Once one becomes a hijra the doors to one’s earlier life are shut forever. It isn’t easy for a hijra to come to terms with his new life. The family, and indeed society as a whole, reacts strangely. Leaving my past behind I ran away to a place with no plan in mind, I didn’t know how will I earn a livelihood or where will my next meal come from.”
“But I just wanted to run away from myself. I became more and more aware of myself, I met many people like me. My quest to be a woman lead me to a totally different life. For being taunted on my state of being, where I was not accepted by my birth family and yet I found my family in other people like me.”
This is a fiction story, written by the author.
I have always been against Glorifying Over Work and therefore, in the year 2021, I have decided to launch this campaign “Balancing Life”and talk about this wrong practice, that we have been following since last few years. I will be talking to and interviewing around 1 lakh people in the coming 2021 and publish their interview regarding their opinion on glamourising Over Work.
If you are interested in participating in the same, do let me know.
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We also have a Facebook Group Restarter Moms for Mothers or Women who would like to rejoin their careers post a career break or women who are enterpreneurs.
We are also running a series Inspirational Women from January 2021 to March 31,2021, featuring around 1000 stories about Indian Women, who changed the world. #choosetochallenge