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Thoughts of a Second Time Mom

You need a son and a daughter to complete your family. A common statement that every woman hears post her marriage. Irrespective of the Gender of the first child (plays even more important role if the first child is a female), the society insist that you have a second child. Having a child is a big responsibility and should be the sole decision of the couple.

My elder son is 4 years old. Just like every other couple once my son turned 2 years, I was being asked the same question by different people. Just like everyother couple, even we took our time to take a decision and then implement it. Yes. I am expecting a baby in the Spring of 2019, somewhere along with the Royal Baby.

Now, being a second time mom, you must be thinking, that as I have been through the process of pregnancy and delivery once, it must be quiet easy for me. But the reality is far from what anyone thinks. I still get nervous thinking about the process of delivery of my child. Like my previous pregnancy, this time also I may have to undergo a C-section. Even though the process was pretty simple last time and I had literally next to zero problems due to the surgery, it was more of the fear that gripped my mind completely.

Being a second time mom, my stress this time is totally different. Yes, every pregnancy is different, just because your body has been through the process once does not mean that you are prepared for it mentally the second time. The biggest stress, that I am sure we all second time mom’s have is coming out of our comfort zone. I had just entered my comfort zone, when my elder son turned 4 years, as he was now more independent and I had just now started to set my own schedule. The fear of loosing my independence and schedule once again has slowly started getting onto my brains.

Yes, when you are a second time mom, you already know the do’s and dont’s of pregnancy and post partum, but what changes now is that, you are barely able to implement it. A constant fear that runs behind your mind is How will my elder kid react on having a sibling? From the time, I came to know about my pregnancy, I have started to mentally prepare my son,to welcome a sibling in a few months time, but I have seen different kids react, differently to this situation.

May be, I am overthinking and all this may be just running behind back of my mind, because of excessive planning, but I guess it is completely common thoughts that every woman goes through. I personally believe, instead of suppressing our thoughts and emotions, it is important that we talk about it and express it, so that it not only makes us feel lighter but also helps others talk about their experiences.

Technology may have made a lot of things easier for us but still it is important to value human emotions the same way as we did earlier. It is perfectly normal to have fears and second thoughts about your emotions, but it is not advisable that you suppress your emotions for the sake of society.

If you like my thoughts, do follow me on my social media, the link to which are given above this page.

Do share this article with your friends and family.

I would love to hear what you think about the same.

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5 comments

  1. I hear you echoing many of the sentiments that my wife and I experienced. We also have a four year old, and had baby number two last January. We faced many of the same external pressures, and the stress and anxiety of delivery number 2 is no less than the first. Our first was very traumatic, but there are very real concerns as to how the first baby will react to being a sibling. Just know that, no matter how the delivery goes, that second baby will double the capacity of your heart. It’s an amazing endeavor. I wish you good luck through the delivery process! I hope you continue to post through your pregnancy and beyond.

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  2. There is a constant pressure on married women to conceive and then to go for a second child..it is really strong of you to go beyond these pressures and take these decisions with your partner independently. I wish you a very healthy and happy pregnancy and loads of happiness beyond! All the best 🙂

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