One thing that motherhood that taught me is, how much ever I try to teach my son something new he is determined not to do something entirely opposite. When the same thing my husband tries to teach our Son, he immediately learns and practices to do the same. For eg: Me and Suraj go to temple everyday. It has been many days since I was teaching him to do Namaste but just a couple of times his father told him to do Namaste and he just did it right. My tiny tot will be 2 next month. He just says a few words. But then since the last few days which had long weekends, my tiny tot just suddenly started saying more words ,courtesy his Father.
My father worked in State Electricity Department and when we were kids we barely saw him sometimes. My mother would take care of us through out the day and night but yet my brother, who was anything but a quiet child would cry all day and night “Daddyyyyyyy….”, to such an extent that even our neighbours would tell my mother, You take care of him the full day and all he does is cries Daddyyyy…We always highlight and talk about the role of mothers in upbringing children but we quiet often tend to ignore the role of Daddies in our lives. All the father’s definitely play the most crucial roles in our lives but sadly we have restricted the role of a father in our children’s lives to mere fear. “LET DADDY COME HOME…” is the favourite line of all mothers when we find nothing can stop our kids.
But may be the Father hates to be the Villian everytime. We live in a society, which is strictly patriarchal. We have already set some rules on how both the parents should behave and how exactly the role of both the parents should be in a child’s life. A few rules that we sometimes knowingly or unknowingly follow are:
1. It is the duty of a mother to love and duty of father to discipline.
2 It is the duty of mother to take care of the basic necessities of the child and the duty of father to earn for it.
3. A mother should always be available whereas Father’s should be approached only in extreme necessity.
If there is a little bit shift in these roles, then definitely hell breaks loose. We always tend to ignore a Father’s mind or his feelings towards a child. We as a society are so busy in judging father’s role on the basis of the school he sends his Son to or the expensive toy’s or vacations, the father gets for his son, that we ignore how much a man is craving to be with his child. How much guilty a father feels when he cannot reach on time for his son’s annual day because he was busy for his presentation (no presentation, no salary hike, no fancy toys).
Therefore, the Father has no option except to replace his presence by his presents. The best dad brings up the best son when he decides to ignore the stereotypes and rules set by the society. The best dad brings up the best child when the best mom supports the Best Dad in become their child’s best friend. The Best dad brings up the best child, when he trusts his instincts more than what the society says. The best daddy brings up the best child when he is appreciated for his fatherhood skills. The Best Daddy brings up the best child when his presence brings happiness and not fear on a child’s face.
Always remember, a hand that rocks the cradle rules the world but the hands that build the cradle protect the world. Salute to all the Daddies whom we often tend to ignore.
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